Category Archives: staying home

Shifting Ideas

It’s amazing to me how God molds us.  How we think we’ve got our lives planned out the way we want them and then he gives us something totally different.  It’s hard to grasp, to conform ourselves to God’s way and the opportunities He has set before us rather than our own plans.

Now, if you’ve read this post, you know about my love and passion for home.  I thought I had it all figured out. I wanted to stay home and be a blessing to those around me.  If God chose for me to marry someday, fine.  And if he had other plans, fine.  I had learned that contentment is found in the Lord and not in circumstances. I was enjoying my time serving my family and church family.  I was home, where I loved to be and with the people I loved, serving the God I love.

Then came summer and my service changed forms. I was five hours away from home, working 6 days a week.  I had amazing opportunities to share Christ’s love with those I had never met and to grow in my faith as well.  At times, I was very homesick and there were times when I learned about things that I didn’t want to know, but the rewards far out-wayed the costs.

Before camp was even over, I was asked to consider becoming the camp secretary. Wait God, that wasn’t the plan. How can I leave home and my family?  I talked to my parents and they were all for it.  A new, great opportunity to grow in Christ’s love and to serve him in a different environment than ever before.  I was still torn.  I remember calling home one day and I talked to Bethany.  She said, “Mommy told Becca and me that you might be staying at camp and you will NEVER come home again.”  I remember talking to Mom (who quickly set Bethany to rights about the whole thing) crying and telling her that I didn’t want to become one of those big sisters whose younger siblings barely know. I wanted them to know me, not know about me.  To be close and for us to be able to know what the other is thinking and feeling.   My mom is so comforting.  She told me of the great ways she was planning for us to stay in touch and it was because they loved me so much that they didn’t want me to leave.

God slowly helped me grasp the idea.  In the process, He has caused me to rethink the idea of a stay-at-home daughter.  I reread that post I wrote before and found this line:

A stay-at-home daughter is one who has chosen to stay under her Dad’s and Mom’s protection…

I thought about that and realized something: it’s still true.  You can live five hours from your parents and still be under their protection and authority.  You can be a stay-at-home daughter and not live with your parents.

Like so many other things, it’s a heart issue.

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Posted by on September 11, 2013 in staying home


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What is a ‘Stay-at-Home Daughter?’

I get that question (or ones like it) a lot. I’m used to funny looks about it and with yes-I’ll-respect-your-choice-but-I-don’t-really-like-it  looks. I try to be patient and explain with the enthusiasm I feel.

A stay-at-home daughter is one who has chosen to stay under her Dad’s and Mom’s protection and home until they marry (Lord willing). The Bible talks, in Numbers 30, of a Dad’s duty to protect his daughter until they marry and, in Titus 2, it tells the older women to teach the younger women to love their husbands and be keepers of their homes.

The home is a great place to prepare for to be a wife and mother.  Think about it- If God created women to be helpers to their husbands, then doesn’t it make sense that a girl trains for this position? When a man wants to be a plumber, he doesn’t train to be a baker, he trains to be a plumber!  And yes, a girl should train to be a helpmeet. There are so many things to learn that will bless her future husband. Not just things like cooking and cleaning- they are easy and can be learned fast. Things like submission and cheerfulness are hard. They take time and work to learn. Girls have such an opportunity to practice with their Dads!  They can practice submitting to their Dad and can practice joy in all circumstances!  If a girl has younger siblings, she can learn to care for them and can learn patience and by watching her parents, she can learn to discipline biblically.

A girl at home has so many opportunities to bless others, too!  She can be actively involved in her church and community.  Staying home will look different for each girl.  That’s what’s so cool about it!  There are so many options and opportunities to serve your family and community!  Also, she can be constantly challenged by God and discipled by her parents.  Most other people in the world won’t confront you on your sin, but your parents will.

I am so thankful that I have the opportunity to stay at home!  Even if I never get married, I want to serve God with everything. I’m thankful for this time I have!  My goal in life is not marriage;  it’s to glorify God and to enjoy him forever!

1 Corinthians 7:34b says this:

“An unmarried woman or virgin is concerned about the Lord’s affairs: Her aim is to be devoted to the Lord in both body and spirit.”

I would highly reccommend the book “Joyfully at Home” by Jasmine Baucham for more information on this topic!


Posted by on January 22, 2013 in staying home


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