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Author Archives: Kimmy

About Kimmy

Hi there! My name is Kimmy and welcome to my little space of the Internet! I am just a regular person saved by grace through faith in the sacrifice of Jesus Christ. A few of my interests are theology, running, horseback riding, baking, ASL, the flute, reading, and laughing with friends.

Hardworking Pride

I’m going to back track here for a moment. A couple posts back I was re-reading Crazy Busy, right? And then my life got crazy busy and I haven’t posted in a while. But there is another lesson from that book that I wanted to write about because it came up again this week.

As we all know, I may have a tendency to say yes to everyone and everything. Hence the busyness. This week I had a really hard time saying no to people. All good things and all things I love but by the end of the week I was feeling overwhelmed and burdened and I knew it was my own darn fault.

And finally I remembered something from Crazy Busy:

“We are busy because we try to do too many things. We do too many things because we say yes to too many people. We say yes to all these people because we want them to like us and we fear their disapproval. It’s not wrong to be kind. In fact, it’s the mark of a Christian to be a servant. But people pleasing is something else. Doing the cookie drive so you can love others is one thing. Doing the cookie drive so that others might love you is quite another. So much of our busyness comes down to meeting people’s expectations. You may have a reputation for being the nicest person in the world because the operating principle in your heart is to have the reputation for being the nicest person in the world. Not only is that a manifestation of pride and therefore a sin; it also makes our lives miserable (living and dying by the approval of others), and it usually hurts those who are closest to us (who get what’s left over of our time and energy after we try to please everyone else). People often call it low self-esteem, but people-pleasing is actually a form of pride and narcissism.” Crazy Busy pg. 35

So if reading that didn’t kick you down several notches like it did me, then maybe you don’t need to be reading this post at all. As for me, I believe I felt my blood pressure spike as I read a thorough description of myself in a stranger’s book.

Pride can be very sneaky and sometimes imperceptible because it worms itself into our good intentions. I found that while I’ve been busy, so has my prideful spirit. I realized this week that I need to really evaluate and pray over my motivations for why I’m involved in things. I need to go back to my “Before I say Yes” List and make sure I’m using it.

But I’m also thankful that I’m not flying blind by myself here. I have the Holy Spirit living in me to convict and guide. And I have friends who will help hold me accountable. What a blessing those two things are!

 
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Posted by on June 8, 2019 in encouragment

 

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Imperishable

This week I have walked through murky, dirty water. I have listened to the sound of it squish around my feet. I have seen its mud everywhere. This week I have also sat in ashes. I have coughed and wheezed. My eyes have burned from smoke. I have thrown away more things than I care to count.

It has been a long week, friends. Last Friday, we got a big thunderstorm and overnight, my town flooded. And along with it, my church. I’m not talking a little moisture here, I’m talking 6-8 inches of dark water through the entire basement. I was in shock. It was one storm! This hasn’t happened in the 6 years I’ve lived here. Needless to say, it was A. LOT. of clean up.

But as I watched the doors open on Saturday for volunteers to come help and I saw them stream in, I was reminded that the church is not the building. The church is God’s chosen children and we had a time of sweet fellowship cleaning that building where we worship our King.

Bright and early on Sunday morning (like 3:30am folks) I woke up to noise going on outside my bedroom door. I couldn’t figure out what it was so I flung open my door to find 6ft flames burning their way through my wall and just touching the ceiling. Do you know that feeling? Do you know what it’s like to wake up and find that scene right outside your bedroom? I’m sure some of you do. I was able to put the fire out with an extinguisher from the hallway and I realized that I must not have blown the candles that were on my bookshelf out before I went to bed. 😦

And as I literally sat in dust and ashes on Sunday morning, thinking of my childhood books that were ruined and gone forever, there was only one passage I could think of. It ran through my head over and over again.

“Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ! According to his great mercy, he has caused us to be born again to a living hope through the resurrection of Jesus Christ from the dead, to an inheritance that is imperishable, undefiled, and unfading, kept in heaven for you, who by God’s power are being guarded through faith for a salvation ready to be revealed in the last time.” 1 Peter 1:3-5

I have had the help of so many people this week that it would be impossible to list them all. My friends and church family jumped right in and surrounded me with love and practical help. I don’t know what I would have done without them.

But the thing I’m most thankful for is a salvation that is imperishable. One that isn’t kept on earth where things like floods and fires destroy. One that is kept safe for me. Praise the Lord for that.

 
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Posted by on May 24, 2019 in life

 

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My Thing Isn’t Top Priority

Today I reread a very freeing thing. Yup, you got that right. I picked up the book Crazy Busy to reread because a) I love that book and b) I felt like I needed to hear its message again. Turns out I did.

My absolute favorite part of the book is the section about ministry. I have a really hard time with ministries because to some degree I always feel like I should be doing more. Everyone around me can make the case that the work they are doing is the most important and should be top priority and I should support it. Inside my church and outside. It’s pretty easy to feel guilty for not helping everyone with their passion. (Just like it’s easy for me to feel like the ministry I’m involved in should be everyone’s top priority!)

But that’s the thing. I can’t be passionate about EVERYTHING. It’s exhausting and draining. And that’s ok! I’m not supposed to be! That is the wonderful, beautiful thing about the church! I’m going to let Kevin DeYoung take over here for a minute:

“Every Christian must be prepared to give an answer for the reason for the hope that we have (1 Pet. 3:15), but not everyone will do beach evangelism. Every Christian should be involved in the Great Commission, but not everyone will move overseas. Every Christian should oppose abortion, but not everyone will adopt or volunteer at a crisis pregnancy center. We need Christians who spend their lives improving inner-city schools and Christians whose dream is to get great theological books translated into Polish. And we need Christians who don’t make others feel guilty ( and don’t feel guilty themselves) when one of us follows a different passion than another. I read and write a lot. That’s what I do well. But that doesn’t mean anyone should feel guilty for not reading and writing as much as I do. You have you own gifts and calling. You have to be okay with other Christians doing certain good things better and more often than we do.” Crazy Busy pg. 49-50

Sometimes I fall into the trap of believing that the thing I love, everyone should love and support but that’s not the case. Kevin does clarify earlier in the chapter that there is a difference between caring and doing. For instance, all Christians should CARE about starving children in Africa, but not all Christians are called to go to Africa and do something there.

What a weight off my shoulders! This is exactly what I needed to be reminded of this week, people! I don’t need to feel pressured by other people to be involved in every. single. good. thing. and I also don’t want to pressure other people who aren’t passionate about the ministries I’m involved in. The church is a BODY for a reason and I’m SO thankful!

 
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Posted by on May 11, 2019 in books

 

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Tithing vs. Generosity

I’ve been mulling an idea around in my head for weeks but I’ve been REALLY spacey lately so I’m just getting around to putting it on…paper?

I’ve been thinking about tithing. The less money I have, the more I’ve thought about this. I’ve also found out that a surprising number of people don’t actually believe in tithing. So I looked into some verses. I think most people think of Abraham in the Old Testament when they think of tithes. In Genesis 14, Abraham tithed a 10th to Melchizedek. What I actually found is that there are numerous types of tithes in the OT. But once you move into the New Testament, tithing really isn’t mentioned (except a couple times by Jesus which we’ll go over.)

And here is where people split off in two directions. You can be in Camp A where tithing is just an OT thing and Jesus did away with it when he came, or you might be in Camp B which decides that since a common tithe in the OT was 10% that’s a good guideline to follow for life.

I think I’m going to have to pick Camp C unfortunately. What did you really expect? Hear me out:

Camp A has some serious flaws. Jesus did do away with several things when he came to earth. But he came to fulfill the law, not abolish it. (Matt. 5:17, Rom. 3:31) We don’t offer animal sacrifices anymore, but in Romans 12, we are commanded to offer ourselves as LIVING sacrifices. Also, Jesus does uphold the concept of tithing in Matthew 23:23-24 as he tells the Pharisees that they tithe but neglect to show justice, mercy, and faithfulness. He tells them that they ought to have done both. So I really have a hard time just throwing out tithing altogether simply because it’s not mentioned explicitly in the NT.

However, Camp B also has flaws. I would have a problem picking ONE of the tithes in the OT and declaring that that is the one we should all follow. I think if you add the OT tithes together you actually get about 23% of a household’s income so I’m not sure why we don’t use that figure? (Don’t bet your life on that math.)

My point really is this. The NT actually does say quite a bit about tithing but it doesn’t use that word. Is that really what is tripping people up? Besides all the times that Paul took up collections for the saints in various places, here are just three of the passages I found:

“And he sat down opposite the treasury and watched the people putting money into the offering box. Many rich people put in large sums. And a poor widow came and put in two small copper coins, which make a penny. And he called his disciples to him and said to them, “Truly, I say to you, this poor widow has put in more than all those who are contributing to the offering box. For they all contributed out of their abundance, but she out of her poverty has put in everything she had, all she had to live on.” Mark 12:41-44

“We want you to know, brothers, about the grace of God that has been given among the churches of Macedonia, for in a severe test of affliction, their abundance of joy and their extreme poverty have overflowed in a wealth of generosity on their part. For they gave according to their means, as I can testify, and beyond their means, of their own accord, begging us earnestly for the favor of taking part in the relief of the saints— and this, not as we expected, but they gave themselves first to the Lord and then by the will of God to us. Accordingly, we urged Titus that as he had started, so he should complete among you this act of grace. But as you excel in everything—in faith, in speech, in knowledge, in all earnestness, and in our love for you—see that you excel in this act of grace also.” 2 Corinthians 8:1-7

“The point is this: whoever sows sparingly will also reap sparingly, and whoever sows bountifully will also reap bountifully. Each one must give as he has decided in his heart, not reluctantly or under compulsion, for God loves a cheerful giver. And God is able to make all grace abound to you, so that having all sufficiency in all things at all times, you may abound in every good work.” 2 Corinthians 9:6-8

Are you catching the drift here? I would contend that the NT is a huge proponent of giving BEYOND what you think you can afford. Now I’ll be totally honest, some weeks I look at my bank account and think, “Gee Lord, 10% seems like a WHOLE heck of a lot!” I get that! And other weeks I know I can do more. That what I love about that last passage. What you have decided in your heart. A question I ask myself a lot is, “Okay, I give regularly to my church, but am I giving generously??” That’s a challenge for myself and for you and you are going to have to decide what that looks like.

Another thing I’ve come across personally and I’ve discussed it with others is that sometimes it can be much more fun to give to things besides your church. Organizations that are good, you love, and you are passionate about. Oh, that’s a struggle for me. I think both are important but I cannot give to the organizations and neglect my church. I’ve heard the argument that you’ve been burned and now you don’t trust your church with your money and I would say that you first need to examine your heart and motivations for giving. Are you cheerfully giving or coming up with an excuse not to? And secondly, if you REALLY don’t trust your church financially, that’s a problem that you should address with your leadership.

I love that the believers in Macedonia gave beyond their means and begged Paul to take it for the saints. What a precious blessing that must have been for them! And what a great example for us.

 
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Posted by on May 1, 2019 in church, uncategorized

 

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I Done Forgot the Lord!

One of my Dad’s favorite movies is Sergeant York. Maybe it’s just because I grew up on it, but I really do love that movie. Black and white, Gary Cooper, quotable lines, true story- I mean, it’s a great movie!

So a couple of weeks ago I was feeling a little nostalgic and I pulled it out to re-watch. If you don’t know the story line, you really should find a copy and watch it. Alvin York is a new Christian and in the movie had a very practical way of looking at Scripture. He is a strong pacifist (despite being an excellent marksman) and had asked for an exemption from military duty. I was at the part where Alvin gets the letter back from the government that says he has been denied his request for exemption. He is talking to his pastor and is pretty upset about the whole situation: [read with Tennessee accent; you’ll thank me later]

Pastor Pile: “War’s way to the other side of the ocean, Alvin. Lots of things can happen before you get there. You put your trust in the Lord, and He’ll look out for you.”

Alvin: “I done forgot the Lord! I ain’t never gonna forget him again!”

I didn’t know whether to laugh or cry at that line! The irony of it seemed hilarious but at the same moment the truth hit me smack in the face! I wondered how many times I’ve been fighting for something that I truly believe is right with all that I am but I’ve “done forgot the Lord!” How many times have I been working on something for church, etc and not had the right attitude because I’ve forgotten the entire reason I’m there? How many times have I just gone through the motions. Ouch, Alvin.

Another priceless quote from that movie is this one:

Alvin: “I ain’t a-goin’ to war. War is killin’ and the Book is agin’ killin’, so war is agin’ the Book.”

Pastor Pile: “Alvin, you’ve got the use’n’ kind of religion not the meet’n’ house kind.”

Oh gosh! I choked on my water at that! I’ve got enough nerve to say that most Americans have the “meeting house” kind of religion, not the “using” kind. They are good with the Bible on Sundays (as long as it’s done in time for sports games) and holidays, but heaven forbid God’s Word actually has a role of authority in their life. Like the Jews in Jesus’ day who wanted signs, we want to hold on to the promises of the Bible without caring who Jesus is or what he requires from us.

I love Alvin in the movie. I know it’s not fully accurate to the true story and now you are probably sitting here thinking I’m a huge pacifist. (Guess you should watch the movie, huh??) But I love how literally he takes the Bible. How fully he believes every word in it and applies it to his life. It challenged me to do the same thing. ‘Cause I really want to have the use’n’ kind of religion!

 
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Posted by on April 17, 2019 in movies

 

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The Third Mile

If you look at my running stats, my slowest mile will always be the third one. I despise mile three. I’ve run 5Ks before but as a general rule, I don’t run three miles unless I’m in a race. I’ll run 2 or 4+ before I stop at 3. It may sound dumb but that third mile is a killer for me. I’ll be feeling just fine and then suddenly my stomach decides it would like to be on the outside of my body, and my head thinks it has a drum inside, and my feet seem to be made of lead. Worst. Mile. Ever.

Today marks the end of Mile Three since my first seizure. I can’t believe it’s been three years. Seems a whole heck of lot longer to me. And I’m not gonna lie; they have been hard years. Some days I still long to have “myself” back. Sounds weird, huh? Every time I meet a new friend, I still have the feeling that they aren’t meeting the real Kimmy and sadness creeps over me. Like they only are getting to know a partial person. Some days I could do without the constant headaches and the exhaustion.

I have been seizure free for 1 year and 4 months now. That is the most common question I get asked about my health and I really do thank God for that fact. But that doesn’t mean I feel a lot better. Some days I do but not usually. Some days I feel like a petty teenager with crazy emotions everywhere! Side effects of meds are hard, folks.

It’s not a big secret that John is my favorite Gospel. (Are you allowed to have favorites??) I LOVE that book. Last week I heard a sermon that referenced John 12:24-26. In those verses, Jesus talks about how a seed must die in order to bear fruit. And because of his death, SO much fruit would come! Verse 25 stands out to me:

“Whoever loves his life loses it, and whoever hates his life in this world will keep it for eternal life.”

I’ve been asked if I could go back to before April 10, 2016, would I? And the answer is no. There is so much that God has taught me about himself and I wouldn’t give that up. There are areas that I needed to grow in spiritually and I know that now. I loved my life a lot back then and it was really selfish of me. I’m glad I lost it. I have a better, more eternal view of life now.

One of my newest favorite songs is “Scars” from I Am They. The first part of it goes like this:

Waking up to a new sunrise
Looking back from the other side
I can see now with open eyes

Darkest water and deepest pain
I wouldn’t trade it for anything
‘Cause my brokenness brought me to You
And these wounds are a story You’ll use

So I’m thankful for the scars
‘Cause without them I wouldn’t know Your heart
And I know they’ll always tell of who You are
So forever I am thankful for the scars

I love that. And it’s so true. Without having gone through all the hardship, I wouldn’t know Christ as well. I wouldn’t have the opportunities I have now to minister to others. So I’m thankful. Just a few verses down in our John passage, Jesus is praying and he says, “Father, glorify your name.” (vs.28) Amen. That’s my prayer also, whether Mile Four gets easier or not. 🙂

 
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Posted by on April 10, 2019 in epilepsy

 

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The Phlegmy Religion

Do you have words that you just don’t like? I’m not talking about swear words here; I mean ordinary words that you simply don’t like to use and you may not even know why? For instance, I despise the word phlegm. I do an inner shudder when I hear it, I don’t say the word, and I would probably never use it in a blog title. I also don’t like the word waft. My best friend hates the word moist. Think about it: you probably have some.

But I’ve been doing some research on a particular religion and for some reason the only word I could conjure up to describe it is that nasty word up top. (Plus whenever I hear it, I always think it sounds like someone sneezing.) Gnosticism. Don’t let the big word scare you away- until about two weeks ago, I didn’t really have a clear idea on what Gnosticism was. I knew it wasn’t a good thing but that’s about it. I went through some training a few weeks ago and I was a little shocked at how prevalent this viewpoint really is. I’ll be honest and say that most of what you are going to hear from this point on will be from that training and my research after it.

In short, clear terms, Gnosticism is a belief system that centers around man. It believes in an inner light or divine spark in every person. It places a huge value on feelings and experience and believes that a person can experience God outside of the Bible. Gnostics aren’t big on authority or institutions such as the church because they have a more subjective view of morals and revelation. Gnostics tend to be very spiritual and sometimes almost mystic.

So if none of that makes any sense to you, let me give you ways that this plays out in real life:

-Personal, special revelation has replaced God’s Word
-Morals are subjective- I get to decide what’s right for me, you can decide for you
-Experience trumps Scripture- what you feel is true and right, doesn’t matter what anyone else says
-No absolute truth- you assign meaning to things (such as gender)
-God wants me to be happy- pull the verses you like out of Scripture
-Follow your heart, you have a light that is special and unique to only you

Does ANY of this sound familiar to you?? Because it certainly does to me. And the scary thing is that some of it sounds familiar because I’ve heard it from believers. People, that scares me. This stuff is wrong and it has infiltrated God’s church! It can be tricky to catch because a Gnostic can know all the right terms and use the same phrases as biblical believers but what I just wrote above is NOT the gospel. You cannot have the gospel apart from God’s Word (his WHOLE Word) and you cannot decide that you get to call the shots. That’s not how it works.

A verse from Hebrews 2 is popping into my head right now. (May I just add that all of Hebrews 1 talks about Christ being preeminent to all? We aren’t little gods running around. Just wanted to clear that up.) Hebrews 2:1 says:

“Therefore we must pay much closer attention to what we have heard, lest we drift away from it.”

That’s highly applicable. How close are you, am I, paying attention to the Scriptures? Do we know it well enough so that when nuances are brought in from the outside we can quickly identify them as the false teachings that they are? I think we need to start paying “much closer attention.”

Otherwise you might get caught up in a gross, phlegmy, false religion.

 
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Posted by on March 31, 2019 in theology

 

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